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How to initiate first contact with a stranger, part 1

Are you a party girl or boy? Regardless of your job title, you must master basic social skills and ability to start conversations with strangers that are magnetic.

Do you want instant likeability? Then read on.

At the end of these blog series, you will never again bechallenged socially in terms of what to say or start with when you meet strangers. Gain the confidence to get beyond small talk and create lasting connection with people you meet.

Scenario 1: You go to a party and see a lady or a man you like.

We have all been in these kinds of situations. A chance meeting gets you close to someone you get an instant attraction. Where do you begin? You attend an event or party or meeting and see someone.

Make sure you look at them. Yes, make a deliberate looking at them such that you gain eye contact. Keep your gaze at the person such that they break the looking as you continue looking without blinking.

Remember, ‘looking at someone or something’ is not an offense under any the laws of any country. So, use that right. Look at the person of your interest in such a way that you gain eye contact, they blink off and you continue looking.

Do it in such a way that the person looks again at you and finds you are still looking. Then study her reactions when they notice you continued to look at them.

That creates a consciousness in their mind that you are looking at them. It is a great start.

Carefully observe their reactions.

The next step is to try to get within ear distance so that you may extend greetings. Use some creativity. If the person is seated alone on the table, go and request to join them on the table. “May I join you?” If the answer is no, move on. Life is about taking risks. Better try than regret having not tried.

Remember, when you see someone you like, your objective is to initiate a first conversation. To have an opportunity to follow up. To obtain enough ‘safe’ information to enable you make second contact. Whatever you do, focus on making contact and obtaining enough details to make a follow up.

To be continued…

Copyright Mustapha B Mugisa, 2019. All rights reserved.

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About Mustapha Mugisa

Mustapha B. Mugisa is one of those rare individuals who delivers unparalleled value-based consulting to professionals and corporate entities that demand excellence. As an alumnus of EY and the current President of the Association of Certified Fraud Examiners (ACFE) Uganda Chapter, Mustapha brings a wealth of experience and expertise to every engagement.

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