Why try me with your sister? “At about 9pm, I had a knock on my bedroom door. Not sure of who was outside, I opened the door. It was my wife’s sister. She was wearing a see-through pink night dress, so tight and revealing like someone with a tight swim suite walking out of a swimming pool.
I could see all her body corners. I was suddenly alarmed. This lady had personally escorted my wife, her sister, to the airport for a seven days business trip to China for an early morning flight. As my mind was racing through so many things, she made eye contact and in a very low tone, said ‘I thought you are thirsty. I made for you some juice so that you don’t get a dry throat at night.’ She then took a sip on the passion juice and handed over the glass.”
It is common for working women to invite relatives to live in their homes. Some relatives are well mannered and know their limits. Others come with different motives. It is the responsibility of the partner whose relatives can live in with them that should be responsible for explaining the family rules – dos and don’ts.
For a better marriage, the standard rule is simple: keep your relatives out of your home. If such is not possible, set clear house rules that they must be made to understand at the start. Each partner is responsible for managing the relatives in the home. Without clear ground or family rules, relatives have been known to leave happy marriages in tatters.
I am often invited at Churches to speak to couples about managing family finances and qualities of a good marriage. during the process, we open to several topics that cover money, sex and religion. Allow me to share a story one of the men in the retreat explained. For purposes of privacy, I will use aliases.
Day 0: My wife’s sister knocks on my bedroom door and hands me a glass of passion juice. I grab it from her, close the door and drink the juice. As I clear the glass, I start thinking all over the episode as if it was a dream. I put on loud music, open WhatsApp to try chatting with my wife. Unfortunately, she is offline. I resort to loud music to get try forgetting the episode. And thankfully, I survive the night.
Day 1: I am awakened by a loud bung on the door. Time check 7:10am. Since the kids are in holidays I had decided to relax. Stay longer in bed. Since sometimes my two children knock on the door to great me, I shout, open. I look at the door, and it is her: my wife’s sister in a night dress. She is carrying breakfast.
She enters next to my bed. Kneels with both knees in a complete kneel down Kiganda style. She looks at me and in the softest tone, says ‘I brought you breakfast in bed. I was asked to look after you very well.’
I look at her and I am speechless and very humbled.
I have been married for over nine years and in all those years of my life I have never had such experience. Breakfast in bed. I sit up; get the legs out of the sheets and move to wash my face to which she asks me not to bother. She offers to bring water.
She puts serving tray with the breakfast on top of the bed. Stands up. Smiles looking at me and turns slowly. She returns with a basin and warm water. She offers to pour for me. I try to turn down the offer; however, I fail to pour the water by myself. I ask for her help, which she easily accepts, as she places her soft palms on my thigh.
Feeling like dizzy, I say inside my head “Satan leave me. Satan leave me.” I thank her and ask her to leave. Which she does without any hesitation. As she walks out, I look at her behind and start comparing with my wife. Come to think of it, my wife has never served me breakfast in bed. She rarely brings juice in the evening. She is always work, work, work. We are both too busy people in a home, which the housemaid seems to control.
To be continued.
I wish you success in your marriage.
This is a guest blog. Copyright 2019. mustaphamugisa.com.