“A perfect partner makes a great family” – Fr. John Mungereza
Last Sunday, Fr. John Mungereza, the Parish priest of Our Lady of Africa Mbuya church explained a four step process young Christians should use so as to find a great marriage partner.
Friendship.Fr. John explained that, you should start by forming friendship. Have many friends so that youare exposed to great people.
The best places to find people are at school, church, party, or workplace. It is advisable to make friendship with people you meet at places that are respectable. Avoid looking for friends in places like night clubs. If you are still at school, now is the time to form friendship with your classmates, students in other classes, schools debate, sports clubs or revision groups.
Research conducted in 2001 on why some marriages lasted longer, while others broke up quickly discovered that where the partners knew each other from school, or where they married when they are still poor financially or just starting out in their careers, and developed each other, they had a more happy and stable family than when couples met when one of them was more successful than the other. The critical bond of love, whether in good or bad times did not arise when the conditions of money changed among couples that had married when one of them was better off.
Dating.This is to meet another person, to know more about them, to share information so as to know more about the other person. Please note that dating has nothing to do with sex.
When you meet the person during dating phase, you want them to know about your family, religion, tribe, education and all key information that is critical. For example, you want your date to know that you are a Catholic. That way, they are able to appreciate you as you are. During dating, if you discovered something about that person that is not good, run away as fast as you can.
Fr. John explained about a girl who told him about a young man who invited her for a date. However, during the date, while they were eating, the young man was only looking at the television. The young girl noticed that this young man is looking at the television on our first date. So, she decided to run away as fast as she could. The man was more interested in the television even on the first date.
As you do this, share with your parents and trusted elders.
Courtship.After dating comes courtship, where you try to take things to the next level.
If you want to get married, what does it mean? What does it require? Which kind of commitment is involved?
Share with your parents. Get to understand what it means marrying in church. Get as much guidance so that you understand the blessings involved.
Thereafter, visit each other’s families and get to fully know each other. Marriage needs the blessing of all key stakeholders especially parents. Pray over your union.
Marriage.Then after the above, you can plan your wedding in church. Remember, throughout each step, pray and ask for God’s blessings. More so, communicate frankly and be open. You need to appreciate that there is no such thing as a perfect partner.
Strong marriages are built on understanding one another, forgiving each other and where necessary, making compromises. Praying together over any issue is key.
Wish you success in your marriage.